Thursday, February 2, 2012

Farewell, Kristin

My therapist, Kristin, informed me yesterday that she's moving. I instantly just thought to a new locale here in Boise. Um....no. Virginia. That may make weekly visits a tad bit difficult. I'm feeling really optimistic about it at the current moment. Panic has not set in. Tad bit freaked is all. I don't have too long. Spring Break. I'm ok, I'm ok......I think.
Regret flooded me when she told me. All the crap games I have played. The bending of the truth at times. Getting pissy with her when she told me the nasty, ugly truth. Letting my "bitchy teeanaged girl" show. That's her description, by the way. Endlessly questioned if I really want to get better or not. Here I had this smart chick, a licensed psychologist, help me out each week. But, no. I wouldn't give up ED so easily.

I wonder if I can cram 3 years of goofing off into a few weeks of total make-up!! Not likely. Besides, that wouldn't be classic me. This is just a case of don't know what you have 'till it's gone. While I totally embrace freedom of expression, I'm doing quite a good job at holding back all the obscenities swirling around in my head. But....when I swear, Kristin will swear back.

I will not have a new therapist. My choice. But I'm getting this flashing "CAUTION" sign in my head right now. Besides, if records were ever requested from Kristin, there's NO WAY someone would want to take me on! I'd question their credentials if they did.

I'm going to miss my blonde-haired, blue-eyed therapist. I will miss telling her her office is too hot and then play with the thermostat. She still doesn't have a 2012 calendar in there. Alas! She let me down! Who's going to sit in random spots in her office? Will she even have a new office? And who's going to have staring contests with her? Who's going to have staring contests with ME? Who on earth will hold the talent of making a grown woman cry just by asking "Why?" in the softest tone? And where the heck else am I going to find a doctor that brings me DIET COKE???

I trusted. She honored that. She never gave up on me. Though I'll give her crap, she isn't abandoning me. She's got a lovely little fam bam. It's the right choice for her. And that's important, too. Totally.

Well, Miss Kristin.....I have the utmost respect for you. Always have. I love you for helping me. For continually challenging me and making me think. For pressing all the right buttons. Whether you believe it or not....I am more focused and grounded after being in cahoots with you each week. God bless you, chick.
And safe travels for you and your family.

1 comment:

Jenn said...

I keep re-reading this. I only hope I did my talkie doctor justice. Sad post for me.

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